Gone Rogue (but it is still working)

Day 8 & 9

Well after my meltdown On Day 7 and deciding to eat some egg whites I re-evaluated my caloric  intake for the beginning of the low calorie eating plan.  I really was't coming close to the "protocol" of 500 calories.  My body was shutting down and starving.  Later in the day (day 7) I also had a cup of coffee with stevia and wait for it.... half and half.  I was certain that I had blown the "protocol" and would certainly wake up to a gain the next morning.  I continued on with my day having about 5 oz of protein and a list veggie at lunch.  I got some terrible personal news that night and just couldn't eat my dinner but did manage to get down an orange around 9:00pm.  Can you imagine my surprise when I awoke to a full 2 pound loss!  Yes, that is right TWO POUNDS.

I agonized over and over again over what to do with regard to continuing the diet or not.  In conclusion I decided to give the shots and the protocol a few more days but not to continue on the uber restrictive calorie plan.  I chose to eat only the items on the list with the exception of adding in the half and half in my coffee.

Yesterday (Day 8) I had my egg whites for breakfast, a cup of coffee with the half and half, 5oz protein and cucumbers at lunch, apple for snack, 5oz chicken and asparagus for dinner.  I skipped the second fruit of the day but I did have a second cup of coffee in the afternoon, yes with half and half.  Surely all of this would have me so far off the protocol that I would wake up to a major gain right?


NOPE....

This morning I woke up to a 1.2 pound loss.


I am sort of flabbergasted that adding in the cream which is so tabu hasn't caused me to gain overnight.  I went in for my weigh in and weekly shots today.  I spoke with the dietician/diet coach about all that has transpired.  I almost didn't tell her how I have been altering this so very specific regimen but I thought it important that she know.

She said if the additional protein is working for me then to keep eating it.  She, obviously, suggested removing the half and half.  And also insisted that I eat my two fruits a day.

Right now my calories are hovering around 650-700.  In my mind, there is simply no way I will not continue to loose weight eating what I still consider to be VERY low calories and EXTREMELY clean eating.

My current plan is to keep eating only the items on the protocol menu list and probably add in my half and half in my coffee.  I am dealing with the stevia and if I can get used to it, it will be a good life change to make.  I am also going to probably slowly increase my calories up to 1000 before I am off the shots so that the transition isn't so shocking to my body.

I have decided that if I wake up to a gain at all for more than two days I will most likely discontinue the shots altogether and just go back to a healthy balanced diet and start working out.

In the meantime, I will be finding out what my blood type is so that I can make better dietary decisions for the long haul for my specific body type.

Overall though I am down almost a solid 10 pounds.  WOO HOO!!!

Meltdown This AM

Day 7 & 8

Yesterday, Monday, I awoke to only a .8 pound loss.  Needless to say this didn't exactly make me jump up and down with joy. :(

I had an incredibly long, stressful day yesterday.  Spent the entire day at the home design center working out details for the new home we are building.  This process should be fun and on some level it is, but there have been some hiccups that have made it a bit stressful. The good news is they have broken ground and trenched for the house.  I ended up eating my cucumbers and chicken while I was there going over cabinets, granite, lighting, low voltage electrical, tile, etc...  I didn't get to eat dinner until 7:00pm.  I nearly had a stroke waiting three minutes for my shrimp to cook.

I didn't take the phentermine for the last few days but decided to take it today, half a pill.

I have just been sooo hungry.  My hunger wakes me up in the middle of the night.  I am going so long between meals it just feels like it can't be good for my health.  Today I woke up in tears.  When I weighed myself I was up a pound and then after a healthy bm, I was down .2 pounds.  I do not comprehend how I can starve myself and not loose more than that and potentially gain.

Today I decided to add egg whites to my diet.  I had breakfast, "Oh the humanity!!"  LOL !!  I swear though, I just can't survive on what I am eating.  I understand that my body is supposed to be burning excess fat etc but I just can't wake up in tears from hunger.  I know this isn't hunger from boredom or depression or anything like that.  My stomach actually growls and churns and I am weak and lightheaded.

What I really want is a giant cup of coffee with light cream or fat free 1/2 & 1/2 and sugar... Hell, I would settle for the wicked stevia in place of the sugar if I could have the cream.

Two and half years ago I managed to loose around 60 pounds in about 5-6 months by eating around 1000-1200 calories a day of sensible, healthy foods(including my daily coffee, but no other calories in the form of beverages).  I maintained about a 2/week loss.  I kept most of this weight off until the stress hit me this last year and I just gave up.  For the last several months I had been eating fast food everyday, drinking soda like it was water and eating fatty deserts with practically every meal.  It is no wonder the weight came back on hard and fast.  I have only myself to blame for this.  I decided to do the HCG to "jump start" and get a good chunk, pardon the pun, of this weight off to motivate me.  Eight days in and with all the hunger and such I find myself second guessing this protocol.  It is highly frustrating.

On Sunday I cleaned house and organized things around the house.  I exerted tons of energy that frankly I haven't been used to doing. I have been out of the gym for ages and I don't work up a sweat that often. I think my body has just said, Hey, you are not fueling me enough for this stuff.  I am worried that is is just shutting down and holding on to whatever it has in fear of not getting enough to sustain it.  Now it isn't supposed to be doing this because the HCG is supposed to be burning stored fat in my body for energy.  Which incidentally is also supposed to make me not hungry....

Needless to say I am curious as to what affect this change to the HCG protocol will have on the scales tomorrow.  I just can't live this hungry. 

Sunday NO FUN Day...

Day 5 & 6

Yesterday, Saturday, I awoke to another 2.2 loss!!!  My appetite has started to adjust to the low calorie meals.  The phentermine helped immensely. I am going to try to get through today without it though.

The weekends are especially tough as they are(were) my fun times of dining out and having beer and martinis. Today is the first day of Indy Car racing, there is a Formula One race and the premiere of Mad Men.  This would normally constitute a day of fun food in my house.  Oddly enough I am not missing junk food.  When I think about my cravings I find I am craving just more of just the healthy stuff I am currently eating.  I do, however, miss my Young's Chocolate Stout... Hell, I miss chocolate period.  Adding in my 85% Lindt square during Phase 3 will be nice.  Dark chocolate is just one of my most favorite things and it isn't bad for me which is a huge plus.

Today I awoke to a 1.4 pound loss.  I know this number is great and I should be very happy about it but I was hoping to continue the 2 pound/day loss for a couple more days.  I suppose that isn't realistic.

I tried coffee again yesterday... eh, not so much.  I bought the Folgers Caramel Drizzle k-cups.  It is better sans cream, sugar and foam than my regular dark coffees that I love to make my lattes with but it is still nothing to write home about.  I am having more luck with the hot teas.

I don't think I am drinking the required amount of water but I am getting better.  I didn't eat both of my allotted fruit portions for the day Friday or yesterday, so today I decided to have one of my fruits for breakfast.

Oh and yes, the evil grissini has been OFF the menu since day 1.  The little bastards are still in the pantry alongside the peanut butter chanting an awful chorus... They must be silenced!!!

I think I can, I think I can...

Day 4


Last night was torture, pure torture.  I was so hungry. And of course the more I thought about it, the more torture it was.  It was as if each one of those thin, crunchy bread sticks were calling my name, begging me to eat them.  I ended up eating another apple microwaved with cinnamon and stevia.  From now on, however, I will be making this a protein choice rather than a fruit.  I have also decided that the grissini needs to be removed from my house as all I want to do is eat the entire package.  Evil little, long skinny bastards...


I woke up this morning to a nearly three pound loss...  2.6 pounds.  Yay.  Now I know this has to be a lot of water weight and lack of the fountains of Coke I had been drinking in the past several weeks but nonetheless I am more than encouraged.


I went in this morning for my weekly shots of ALA, B and D.  They always make me feel great and give me tons of energy.  I spoke to the diet coach and we have added a half dose of phentermine to my regime as well.  This should help control my out of control appetite.  It has done wonders for me in the past without HCG.


I made some meals today in advance so I have some stuff ready.  Lunch was baked cod with cucumber slices.  Delicious I must say and a totally doable meal even for a regular diet.  


I still miss my coffee but it isn't like I am giving it up forever... that gives me peace of mind.  And honestly there is something nice about a hot cup of tea.


Tonight is dinner at the place that prepares the HCG meals for those who choose to pay the money to have all of their meals prepared for them daily.  I chose not to do this route for economical reasons plus I like to cook my own things.  But I will say it is a real relief to know I can go to a restaurant and have a meal that is 100% within the protocol for this program.  


Still waiting to hear if I can take my daily cranberry pills on this program though... I hope so.  If not and I should happen to get a UTI, well at least that would make for some interesting posts in this blog and would also switch it from PG to R in no time flat. At the very least, I should be able to add them back in on Phase 3 though so lets just cross our fingers for the next 36 days .  :)


Project:  learn how to boil an egg.  As much of a gourmet chef I consider myself, this task has eluded me.

Too Hungry to be Clever

Well this is day three of my HCG journey.  The first two days I was far too busy eating everything in site! (more on this later...)


I thought that giving myself injections would be hard but now that I have done so three times the anxiety is wearing off.  


This begins my first day of restricted calories. A few thoughts; coffee without cream sucks, I am not sure about this stevia stuff, and I think hot tea is going to be my savior.
Shrimp, steamed asparagus  with lemon, sea salt and pepper and a grissini for lunch. 
Apple for a snack about an hour later. Caved and had another grissini too (shame shame shame). Guess I won't be able to do that everyday. 
Hoping my stomach will shrink in the next day or two as I am STARVING right now. 
Drinking lots of water. Found liquid stevia that is flavored. Made for a nice addition to my soda water. However, I am not sure my body is liking stevia... tbd.


My dinner plan is grilled chicken and either cabbage or cucumbers as there is NO MIXING of veggies.  The one good thing so far is that 2 cups of veggies is quite a bit of veggies and this makes me happy.